i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
