im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
