guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
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i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
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I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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