I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I think I won the penis lottery.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
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