So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
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