I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
The uberlube is also flammable
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
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