wat bout pragnant strippers??
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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