are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize