Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
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