i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
