guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
