sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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