have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
