were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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