I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
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