Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize