YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
