Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
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I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
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I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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