She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
