Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
