I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I wish you could order shots online.
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are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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