she was so not down for the gang bang
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
