You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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