the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
