i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
