dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
