Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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