I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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