Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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