In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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