Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Randomize
