I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize