she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize