Whod you bang
wat bout pragnant strippers??
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
