ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Randomize