I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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