i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Success! We fucked roommates!
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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