they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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