Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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