i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
