I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
