He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
