Too much gin, very little bucket
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Randomize
