did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
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