dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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