We won't sleep together?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
