Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize