please come you make the beer taste better
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize