Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
