Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
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